Monday, May 31, 2004

I've got this new thing over on my sidebar: a guest map. Stick a pin in it!

Sunday, May 30, 2004

Name of the day: Saban McKay Murray. I was wondering how long it would take after LSU's winning the national championship for a child in the Ark-La-Miss area to be named after LSU's head coach, Nick Saban. Here's the first I've seen.

I hate that gas is so expensive because it's taken away, or limited, my favorite Sunday evening activity...driving. I love getting into my car, switching on my stereo, and heading toward some unknown destination only to turn around a few hours later to head home. I would easily blow a whole tank of gas on these excursions because I didn't mind paying $18.00 for an evening alone on the bi-ways of whatever state I'm in. But now I'm reluctant to go out like that because it now costs me $31.00 to fill up. Ugh! It's sad. I can't wait until a solution to this oil crisis is found.

I start school Wednesday. Woohoo!

Saturday, May 29, 2004

I've been wanting to write about this for a week, but every time I sit down to do it, I don't feel like writing about it. But I'll see how I do today.

Last week before I left to go to Houston, I went bra shopping. I hate bra shopping, but I have no chest to boast of, and if I was going to wear this one shirt to the wedding, I needed SOMETHING. So I went to the mall, and I found this "cleavage enhancing" bra. It was very stiff and padded, and I thought it'd be fun to try it on...not intending to buy it. So I put it on, and oh my goodness! I knew what it was like to have boobs. It was amazing! I had a fake chest! I put on my shirt, and it was beautiful. I almost started to cry. So I walked around the store looking for other clothing items and getting a feel for the bra. I loved it. I bought it.

So I got in my car and went to Houston. When I got there, I called my friend who was getting married, and she was with her mom and sisters at a restaurant and told me to join them. I changed out of my driving clothes and put on something more going-out worthy. This included my new padded bra. I raced out the door and into my car. It was the first time I had sat down in the bra. My sitting-down posture is or hunched. The bra didn't respond well to that. It jutted out, and it was SO OBVIOUS that my bra was of the enhancing variety. So I sat straight up in my car, and that was much better. I got to the restaurant and continued my great posture, but it got to be rather uncomfortable because I'm not used to sitting that way. So I started slouching, and the bra started jutting. I was sweating bullets and vowing never to wear it again. I leaned over to my friend at some point and told her I had the mama bear of padded bras on. She laughed.

What do I do with this thing now?

Name of the day: Dymond LeeAnndra Denise. It's a girl, although I think Dymond is more masculine than innovative in spelling. But all names can't be "normal". I've got to have something to make fun of.

I found some rawhide doggie treats in the house. One kind didn't smell like anything, but my dog acted like she was going to chew on it for a while. Then she just quit and wouldn't have anything to do with it. So I gave her this other kind that smells like crap. She's eating it.

Writing in my blog, I often start sentences with "I" because this is, afterall, all about me. I sometimes when writing here. And I am reminded of early markings of my self-absorbtion. Do you remember being in grade-school spelling classes and having to write each spelling word 5 times and making up a sentence with the proper usage of each word for homework? Well, one time in third grade, I decided to be a smart ass and write a sentence that began with the word "I" for each spelling word. So I had sentences like "I like to look at myself in the new mirror mommy purchased for me." Purchased being the past form of purchase, one of the words for the week. Another sentence I recall was "I didn't want to watch 'Star Trek', so after a fit of fury, daddy changed the channel to 'T.J. Hooker'." My teacher made me do them ALL OVER AGAIN citing that using "I" to start every sentence exhibited laziness and a lack of creativity. I think I worked harder on my sentences than every other kid who opened up Webster's and copied the example sentences from it. Lack of creativity...

Thursday, May 27, 2004

Name of the day: Tru Joy. I'm sorry. I should have first warned you to grab a bucket or a trashcan or something. Cheese like that makes me want to perform unnecessary painful surgeries on myself.

Lately I haven't felt much like writing anything here. Funny things happen to me everyday, but I don't feel like putting them down. Like today, I had to make a phone call, and I started punching buttons on the phone. But guess what...I hadn't picked up the receiver! A 90 year-old man was hitting on me in the office. He was yacking my ear off about 90 year-old crap, and I was trying not to bust up laughing while the rest of the staff was on the other side of the wall sniggering at the situation.

Eventful things have happened. I'm officially a student again. I'm registered, ID'ed and parked. I haven't bought a school t-shirt yet, and I doubt I will. I'm excited about learning again. My brain is slowly turning into useless, gelatinous goo, so I need to do something to strengthen it. I'll be taking a biology course and the lab that goes with it. It should be very interesting, entertaining and enjoyable.

I'm currently quilting my first quilt. QUILTING, Zannah...the quilting that involves hand stitching shapes and patterns and squares. Last night the quilt was a group effort, but now that group time is over, I am now correcting mistakes in stitching, and I will stitch it closed. I'm nervous about this, but last night was not so difficult. It's a cute baby quilt. I'm excited to present it to a friend who just had a baby boy.

I have strong desires to leave the country because I'm tired of all of the political NONSENSE going on. That's all I shall say about politics. I just really want to take a very long beach vacation far away from certain influences...Tahiti is my ideal.

I have an exposition of sleep come upon me. It's time for bed.

Monday, May 24, 2004

Name of the day: Shataka Figgins. I'm not sure which I like best, her first name or her last.

A new season of Reno 911 is starting in a couple of weeks. I'm so excited! I'm also glad that Comedy Central is showing reruns of the first season right now. I love that show; it cracks me up. My parents have been entertaining the idea of changing from digital cable to satellite, which upsets me greatly because satellite TV no longer carries Comedy Central or MTV, my two favorite channels.

I'm tired of being a dependable person, but I can't help being so. I guess it's not so much my dependability that bugs me as much as it's my not being married with babies. I'ma 'splain. I've said numerous times that I'm one of three people over the female youth in my congregation, but the other two have just had babies. Next week is girls camp, but classes also start for me. One of the three of us is supposed to spend the night every night at camp. The other two can't do it because they are breast-feeding, and who wants to bring a new baby camping anyway? But I have class at 9:00 every morning, and the camp is 50 minutes away. That means I will have to get up extra early and go to school smelling funky. And when the hell am I supposed to study while I'm out in the woods?! This just sucks, and I'm going to get the brunt of everything because I'm single without kids. W.T.F.?!

I'm going to go to bed early tonight, but I'll leave you with a favorite quote from Reno 911: "God vomited and there was Jackie." Thank you and good night!

Sunday, May 23, 2004

Name of the day: Brewce. Aye!

I thought it was funny talking to all of the Utahns this weekend who were in Houston for the first time in their life. They've watched too many westerns with cowboys riding and shooting in the desert because they were in awe at all of the green forest covering any undeveloped land. I don't know why it made me laugh so much. I guess it seems like a common-knowledge sort of thing.

This weekend I found the place where I want to live. It's in the Champion Forest subdivision in northwest Houston. It is gorgeous. And huge! I mean, the houses are HUGE! Two-car garage? What? Try 10-car garages. These are houses with wings; their guest houses even have wings. Who do I have to marry to move into one of them?

I always feel pretty melancholy a few days after going to see any of my close friends. I have a deep love for them, and it takes me a long time to get over being a long distance from them after I go visit.

One of my favorite roommates (and my last one) from school got married in Houston this weekend, and of course, I went down for it. I wouldn't have missed it for anything. I got to see her family and hang out with them, and now that I'm back, I miss being around those people. I miss shopping with Briana and staying up really late drinking our super big gulps and talking about everything. And I miss our frequent encounters with moose.

Anyway, the wedding was beautiful. Her husband is a wonderful guy, so I am very excited for her. She's gone through a lot of crap, and it's time something great happens to her. His family is a lot of fun, too. I had a great weekend with everybody.

Thursday, May 20, 2004

I've added a word to my "List of Words I Don't Like": credenza. I don't know why I hate this word; it's a normal, not nasty sounding word. The thing being referred to when I hear "credenza" is, in fact, a credenza, yet I can't stand the word.

Other words on my "List of Words I Don't Like":
abreast (not because it has "breast" in it)

That's enough for now.

Sunday, May 16, 2004

"Wheeeeeeeereyouwannastart'er?CanIgetafivehundreddollarbill? Afive? Afive? AfivegottafiveherecanIgetasix?Igottasix.How'boutasixandahalf?ASEVENhundreddollarbill! Whowillgohigher..."

I. never. want. to. go. to. another. auction. again. Not because it wasn't interesting, but because now I'm going to have nightmares about an auctioneer following me around telling me what to do really fast, and I will have no clue what the hell he is saying.

At some point this evening, I was thinking that the combination of yuppies and an open bar was becoming one of my favorite sights to see. Later on, I was reminded that drunk people drive me crazy. At the end of the auction, I went to the designated place to pick up some items my dad had bought, and I was stuck in this line of LOUD, OBNOXIOUS, BOISTEROUS PEOPLE! I thought, "If I just hit them, then maybe they'll fall down and go to sleep and shut up." But as I wasn't inebriated and still had control of myself, I just went outside to breathe.

I think that there would be fewer dipsomaniacs in this world if they would realize that there are some who don't drink and who remember the following day what the drunkards did and said the night before. I even remember names! It surprises me that these people, and they are prominent folks here in Monroe, have no shame that they would drink so much in such a public setting and act like complete imbeciles. I understand a 20 year-old college student doing it but not 40 and 50 year-old doctors, architects, auctioneers' wives, etc. You see, they should have grown out of that 20-30 years ago.

Most ridiculous purchase of the night: Ouachita River Spa Package for 6 ladies. This is the description: "Treat yourself and 5 of your closest friends to a day of pampering. Board the KOKOMO and share a champagne toast as the KOKOMO begins a day down the Ouachita River. Then indulge yourselves with individual massages (indeed), facials, pedicures and manicures from the Garden District Spa. Next, enjoy a gourmet lunch and chocolate dessert. Gather on the upper deck for tanning and visiting." Boys and girls, there were two of these packages up for auction tonight. The second one went for $8500. The first? $15,000! I lie not. I wrote the ticket with my own hand. 15,000 damn dollars! Give those people some more booze so they can live through tomorrow.

I now have one of every parents' nightmares in my room: drums! I am sure to make my mom a little crazier now that they are almost set up. She already loves when I crash the cymbals, and of course, I do it because...well...I can. It's going to be a lot of fun. I'm bubbling over in sheer excitement of my possibilities. I imagine having many occurances of the following dialog in the future:

"Mom, get out of my room!"
"Okay." Ratta-tat-tat! Boom! Crash!
"CARRIE, STOP BEING __________!"
more drumming
SLAM! (hopefully that will be her exit.)
Carrie smiles triumphantly and goes on doing something besides playing drums.

Oh, it's gonna be beautiful! I can hardly wait.

Saturday, May 15, 2004

Another post in the span of minutes? What?!

I have been so good about paying my bills and making sure my credit gets back to its former stellar status that my mailbox is stuffed everyday with pre-approved, pre-selected credit card crap. I need another credit card like I need another belly. One of the apps I got today, and the crappiest thus far, was for $2000 limit, but I have a $49 set-up fee, a $60 annual fee, and the APR is 25.7%. Hello! I'll keep the one I have with a $1000 limit, no annual fee and a 9.9% APR. What? Do you think I'm a moron?!

Name of the day: Dontavian Miche'l. I don't understand why certain people feel the need to throw in an apostrophe ANYWHERE they want. It boggles my mind. I can't comprehend the phenomenon. I want to hit all of the people who do this. Line them up!

I haven't felt like writing anything lately because most of my thoughts have been violent in nature, and who wants to read the mad rantings of a bitch? What it boils down to is I wish my parents would see the light and oust "the sisters".

Ursula Braunstaen has been organizing a certain charity organisation's "celebrity" golf tournament and auction that will be held this weekend. It bugs me that she has had hundreds of people marching through the office with auction items and storing them in the back office. It bugs me that more important, her-PAYING-job-related things have gotten pushed aside. It bugs me that she has Pushy Amalgam doing auction related things when she should be doing her paying-job FIRST. I'm glad all of this is over tomorrow night.

And speaking of tomorrow night, guess who will be the "auction writer" for the big event. Me! Yep, I get to listen to the man jibber-jabber about stuff, and then I write down the winning bid and buyer if I can understand what the man says. I'm not too thrilled about it. I guess my favorite thing is the idea that I get to sit back and mentally laugh at the k-list celebs who will be gracing Ouachita Parish with their presence. Among them are several "Survivor" losers. You see, Clay (whatever his name is), the losing semi-finalist of "Survivor: Thailand" is from here. He's gotten some of his "Survivor" buddies to come down for the occasion. I have no idea who these people are because I've never watched the show. I'm a "Friends" fan. You should hear Ursula ooing and ahing over the "celebrities" who are coming.

Let me see if I can give you an idea of who'll be here. Doug Pederson of Brett Farve's backup-fame is hosting the event, so he has some Packer pals coming down here: Bob Kuberski, Craig Nall, Ryan Longwell, and Donald Driver, to name 4. Monroe's own Bubby Brister (HA!). Tim Couch will be here. And for the Mormons (We like to be called Latter-day Saints, if you please.)...Koy Detmer and his hairy self. That's enough of that. That's all of the stardom I can handle today.

Now if I may, I'm going to take my second nap of the day.

Tuesday, May 11, 2004

Yesterday I went to fill up my car, and I paid more than I ever had before (except once when I went to San Diego). It cost me $30 even. OUT OF CONTROL! I guess a perk of being here is that I don't drive very far. Work, church, my friends are within a mile or two to my house. I would really be hurting if I were still living in Utah because my friends lived all over the state, and I spent so much money on gas driving around to see them. Even though I only fill up my car every two weeks or so, watching 30.00 roll up on the pump is a little shocking. I need to go buy a bike.

Monday, May 10, 2004

It's now Tuesday, so guess what that means! That stupid album cover is no longer on this page! Woohoo!

Name of the day: Lawontakee "KeeKee" Deskins. I know this is from some movie Bill Murray was in...What about Bob? maybe. Anyway...LakewinnapassaKeeKee...she's not even Native American!

Well, it's officially Monday. Ugh! Tell me why I don't like Mondays. I don't like Mondays. The silicon chip inside my head gets switched to overload.

Sunday, May 09, 2004

Before moving to France, I would say that I was a very mild fan of Tori Amos. I liked her music, I thought she was weird, I owned two albums, yada, yada, blah... After I moved to France, she released "Scarlet's Walk". I listened to it once in the store, I bought it, I was hooked. I love that album. When I heard she was having a concert in Paris, I bought a ticket. After her show, I would say that I had a strong addiction. I went out and bought all of the albums I didn't own plus any singles or EPs I could find. (Europe is a good place to find those.) She's all I listened to for 6 months, at which point I was back in the states, and I saw her again in concert while visiting one of my best friends in Minnesota thus recharging my addiction. Lately I have been really good about listening to other things. I've bought about 20 new cds in the last 2 months, none of which have her name on them. Some weeks I haven't even touched a Tori cd, but today...I've totally relapsed. I don't care about hearing anything else right now. Sure, I still love all of those other people I love, but right now they're like taking Bayer when I need a heroin IV in my arm. Right now I just need her piano and her breathy, ill-pronounced lyric.

This morning (pre-Tori-relapse) I was listening to some French songs. I have a few guilty pleasures when it comes to French music. One of them is Lara Fabian. Before I knew who she was, I thought I was listening to Celine Dion; they sound so similar, so now you know why she's a guilty pleasure. I was listening to her song, "Je t'aime", and it overpowers me every time I hear it. It is so romantic, and while she isn't Edith Piaf and she's not singing to an accordion, the song does make me think of those things, of "La Vie en Rose", of street musicians, of walks along the Seine kissing and holding tightly to a whirlwind, one-night only affair (I don't remember his name), of scarves, of cafes...of everything that I think is sexy and romantic about France basically, and I long to return there. (exhale)

Saturday night, I went to a store across the river in hick town. I really hate going over there, but when it comes to going to this store late at night, I'd rather go to the one over there than the one in my city...for safety reasons. In the store, my mom was behind this group of girls(?) who apparently played on the high school softball team. These girls(?) strutted around, spoke with deep voices, all bowed up, and SPAT CHEW INTO A CUP!!! True story, people! Girls(?) dippin' tobacco over in West Monroe...crossin' lines that shouldn't ever be crossed. I just wanted to go throw up on them!

I was feeling crafty Saturday night. I MADE a scrapbook. I don't mean that I was scrapbooking...I haven't gone so far yet. The youth at church will be taking a trip this Summer up to Illinois to visit many of the church's historical sites. One of the other counselors (we'll call her 5-O) thought it'd be a good idea to have the girls make scrapbooks so that when they return from the trip, they can fill them. 5-O has a book her mom made back in the day. She uses it more as a journal, but we are going to use that as the template for the scrapbooks. I got busy tonight making sure it was fairly easy to do, and it was. I've entered a new realm...a realm that involves spray adhesive and scrap material. I never even knew there was such a thing as spray adhesive before this project. It's great! But don't want to breath it in. It's not good.

Today was another lazy Saturday. Saturdays are going to be lazy while I'm having allergy issues. All of the meds I've tried to combat this make me extremely tired, so I can't take them during the week days. I just have to suffer. But I'll be damned if I sneeze and have itchy throat all weekend long!

One more day before the photo album is gone. Yay! Oh...and I forgot Mother's Day! I'm a terrible child. Sue me.

Friday, May 07, 2004

Name of the day: Nydia Nechole. So...nevermind.

I've decided I need to post something if only to make that stupid album cover go away. Those guys are givin' me the jibblies every time I see them now. It makes me twitch.

As you all know (and if you don't, where the hell have you been) Friends ended last night. I'm both sad and glad because the writing on the last two seasons was bad, but after 10 years watching them, what does a girl do? Thursday night is no longer "Friends night". It's just Thursday night now. Huh... But I am glad it ended the way it did. I was going to throw up if Rachel had not returned to Ross.

I have an appointment with an academic advisor today to find out what I need to take when. This will actually be the first time I've ever met with one of those, which is probably why it took me so long to finish a B.A. in the first place, so this is probably a good move. My main question is what do I take this summer since classes for a communications masters don't start until Fall? Biology or chemistry?

Tuesday, May 04, 2004

Name of the day: Roikia Vashun. It sounds like a Hindu god or something, but I think Roikia's mom, Chavonn, is just crazy.

My mom and I have been having a territorial feud again. I get perturbed that she's in my room all the time. Last night I was wanting to watch something, but she was watching her show in my room while my dad was watching something in the living room. I don't like to go into their room to watch TV. Why should I? It's their stupid room, and she was invading mine. So I drove to Shreveport last night, bought some water and roasted pumpkin seeds and drove home. It was a good, quiet drive.

So this morning, to be as childish as possible, I switched the resolution on the computer so that everything was really tiny. I knew it would make my mom mad, and I also knew that she would have no clue how to fix it. I did that right before leaving work, and while walking out the door, I put some rock music in the stereo and cranked up the volume. My mom doesn't wake up until well after everyone has gone to work. I wanted to help her get up a little earlier today. She's in a funk, and I'm pleased with myself. If she wants lines drawn a little more clearly, I have more tricks up my sleeve. Good grief! I've gotta get out of this house! All in due time, my pretties...all in due time.

Monday, May 03, 2004

WTF?! You know what? I'm not even going to say anything else about this. You can have fun thinking up your own things to say, but if you click on the image, you will see where I found it and many other strange album covers.

I have really been slacking on my "Name of the day" searching. I guess that happens when I quit looking in the paper or quit going to work. Well, I am going into work today, so I should have something really good...maybe. I did look in the obits and found names like Beulah and Vesta, but those are hardly funny when they belonged to people who had lived 101 and 95 years respectively. Now if it was a newborn baby, HA! Sheer comedy. I'd probably track down the poor bugger and get her primed for a life of name torture. But these people are dead. May they rest in peace...peace from a life of bad names. Am I being irreverant? Probably. Sue me!

So last night I was watching an NBA playoff game between the Lakers and the Spurs, and I had another fond flashback from my world travels. Last year at this time, I was in Senegal in West Africa, and we (my study abroad group) were staying in a rather nice hotel with great satellite cable. Hey, getting MTV in freaking Africa means great satellite. Some of us (like 5 of us) thought it'd be fun to stay up all night and watch the NBA Championship games (which started around 1 AM there). We all met in one of the rooms with our pringles, carambars, and fanta, and watched while listening to the commentators, who spoke French. One of the commentators was obviously American because he had a horrendous French accent, and he directly translated American idioms (thank you, Zannah). At one point somebody from one team totally stuffed another guy who was shooting, and the commentator shouted, "PAS DANS MA MAISON!!!" (NOT IN MY HOUSE!!!) We cracked up so hard; we were all crying. It was hilarious. Not long after our recovery, another player made this fabulous shot, and the commentator bellowed, "S'IL VOUS PLAIIIIIIIIIT!!!" (PLEAAAASSSSSE!!!) It was awesome! 'Twas the best time I've ever had watching any championship game. This year I shall watch pining for last years conditions.

Saturday, May 01, 2004

There hasn't really been anything to blog about lately. The only fun thoughts I've had today were about Aaron Stanford in Tadpole, but I'll keep those to myself...such a cutie...

I got my ticket for the Pixies concert in the mail today. I'm very excited about going to Atlanta to party with Llew. Just 165 days left! Woohoo!